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Memorable Quote:
You know you ghetto when you have bought more hair than you will ever grow.


Oh, I Know You Have Money! Stop Lying!

"Tally Up Those Nigerian/Lotto Scam E-mails!"

Don't be fooled by all the bad economic indicators, the Federal Reserve is missing quite a few calculations. That's because millions of Americans are squatting on their wealth, failing to disclose it, or sometimes just turning it away and not claiming it as collateral for other assets, like loans, property, heritage and more.

Every single day, you receive millions. Just today alone, I received an offer for an ATM card that will allow me to withdraw $15,000.00 daily. But you, yes YOU, you probably just click "delete" when someone bombards your e-mail with wealth because you're thinking, "No thanks, I have enough cash and problems".

But those Nigerian Scam, Euro Lotto Winnings, Foundation Grants and Check Processor (money laundering) e-mails are your assets. They're in your e-mail account (an asset) which belong to you and they hold a substantial dollar value - see amount in e-mail(s).

I don't mean to brag, but just look at my net worth (umm...you may want to put on sunshades and earphones because of all the "bling" and "cha-ching" sounds):
What I Received In One Month Alone
And yet even more money is coming daily! - that's a lot of Snickers bars!

Okay, normally, I wouldn't disclose this information for my safety and security, but "I'm just trying to help, Ike". And right now, people around me are fighting for inheritance rights of my assets which are now worth trillions, if I include the Nigerian scam dollar value. Without the Nigerian scam dollar value, I'd say, I'm roughly worth...$2.27 - TWO DOLLARS AND TWENTY SEVEN CENTS -- CASH MONEY!!!

So add up your monies and tell us how much you're worth. Stop hoarding it, you Nigerian-aire! You're only hurting and stalling the economy!

How Much Are You Worth In Nigerian/E-mail Scam Dollars?
Less than $5 Million$5 to $10 Million
$11 to $20 Million$21 to $50 Million
$51 to $75 Million$76 to $100 Million
More than $100 Million - So Do NOT Crowd Me

Why Are You Keeping Those Millions A Secret?
So Busy Focusing On Gas Costs No Time To Count My Money
I Want To See How Well I Can Live Without It
My Accountant Quit - Got Tired Of Counting My Money
I Do Not Want My Neighbors Coming Over To Borrow More Than Sugar
My Kids Are Crumb Snatchers
I Do Not Want Oprah, Warren Buffett Or Bill Gates To Start Hating On Me
Hiding It From The Feds Until I Can Move It To Switzerland

Now That The Cat Is Out The Bag, What Is Your Next Big Purchase?
Tank of Gas
Loaf of Bread
Gallon of Milk
Lottery Ticket
Slurpee
Other

     

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